Living between Realism and Idealism

Entries for February, 2009

February 6, 2009

[384] Can you be my friend for now, tomorrow and forever?

When some people takes friendship too seriously, and somewhat making it evolve into a major-committal relationship, now that irritates me. By all means, I love all my friends, and they will shatter and break my heart if one fine day they decides to stop being friends with me. But not so much to the extent of keeping myself in recluse and hate every other friends in the same circle. I know I sound like a PMS-ing bitch and rants without a proper reason.

I have smart readers, so I know you will eventually get where I am actually heading to. Today, I told a friend that the manner I express myself in this blog, there is so much transparency that I think people would just not choose to talk to me after first getting to know me through my blog because they would (first and foremost) think that I am a very hot-tempered person with a very metaphorical tongue. Oh-kay, that is something I label as self-praise - but not an intentional one. I am just merely justifying myself.

So back to this place where idiots are of abundance. You don't get rain as much as having encounters with idiots here. Yea, it's that bad.

A friend is keeping herself in recluse amongst everyone else here. And it is just the most irritating thing ever. I don't know if the word "recluse" is too strong a word or otherwise, I just don't like the manner she sulks to everyone here as if we all had had a turn in making her life hell.

There are many reasons to eventuate to her behaviour now, and I would not blame her as much as having her eat herself up to misery. The worst, yet the funniest one is that she feels that (out of bluest of the blues) people no longer talks about things which interest her, and she feels disconnected to us. So she chose silence as the weapon to keep us out of her comfort zone, hoping that we are not to alienate her by any chance.

In any logic, regardless of the very limited logic from the greatest of living idiots, why should she even think that the problem originates from us whereas not herself, who is the minority in this situation? Why the sudden cannot-have-a-say-in-this-conversation dilemma pop up?

No shit can get as much bullshitting as that. It takes two to tango and just take an extra effort to know what people talk about. What she does is that she shoves the earphones into her ears (duh!) and watch her drama series at the end of the living room (which is just right beside me). Please-lah, the earphones she is using are not sound-proof from the outside. The into-ear ones are, but hers aren't those. So she can chip into the conversation if she wants to.

So now, she comes into a conclusion that we are the ones isolating her to the City of the Lonely. I have nothing to comment on that besides for the fact that she is the one who had brought this to herself, and no one else.

She walks from Point A to B with earphones plugged-in. Body language? "Don't talk to me, I'd rather listen to my playlist". She makes abrupt decisions to go somewhere without informing people and when nobody enquires about it, she feel ignored. What do I think? There's nothing to even lay a thought in.

I am a person who would just suka-suka, gatal-gatal buka mulut merapu tak menentu. Anybody can just talk to me about anything. She sits right beside me and she just cannot take the initiative to strike up a conversation with me. We did not just met last week. We have been friends since the first semester and this is already the end of our second year. What makes you think that your friends for so long is beginning to dislike you now when they could have done it during the first few semesters?

She cannot comprehend the fact that even though A is her bestie, A also has another circle of friends whom she enjoys their company. So she would take time to enjoy a laughter or two with them. To her, if A is her bestie, A should just remain beside her 24/7 and not go anywhere without her and do everything right under her nose. When A has somehow gotten better with her other group of friends, she feels that she no longer plays importance in A, and she should just go becoming all platonic with her the very next day.

Hence the sulking and self-alienation.

I am very irritated with her behaviour and if she were to be a sibling of mine, I would have landed a big, juicy tight slap right on the most tender side of the cheek, and grazing by the ear while on the way. She is acting all juvenile and I just think, it's high time to wake up and grow up!

What the hell is wrong with you?!

| music | Best of Me - Daniel Powter
| mood | awake

Filed under Daily Dose | feeling sick?

February 8, 2009

[385] Of being frustrated, happy and lab coats

by chenyeng2706 | 05:29 PM

The endometrium walls in my body finally decided to collapse yesterday, after being hung up for 14 weeks and 5 days, allowing the course of nature to take its place - for my uterus would like a fresh change of wallpaper in there. My menstrual cycle was regulating already, until when I went back for previous semester's break, my daily supplement of EPO got cut off. The body went haywire - and my commitment to accommodate a very greedy, fastidious guest on a monthly basis was eased. Hey, I am glad if my period is not around to bug me, I am not quite of a good host.

But of course, I have to have my period on every month, and ideally, on the same date - everyone says the same things to me.

It came and I cannot stop it, ad the worst thing to happen at this time of the month is when there is an interruption in the water supply to my hostel's block. When I say interruption, it should obviously mean water outage. It all started on last Friday, around 1800, and we were already used to the interruption from 1800 to around 2300, and to those people who chose to bathe any time later than 1800 had to bathe after 2300, and I am in that group of people. That day, our water supply came back at only 0200, and I only managed to bathe that time.

Crawled onto bed frustrated, woke up equally frustrated (if not, more) to realise that the water is out again, and I had to brush my teeth and wash my face with my RO drinking water which goes about 20 sen/litre. *rolls eyes*

And that's the day I realised my period came. *picture a brewing of utter pissed-off-ness*

Then I heard a huge burst of water from the ground floor, realising that people were queueing up to get pails and pails of water supply. And the an abrupt notice was posted up at the ground floor, at a place so dismissable, that neither of us saw the piece of paper.

Water Cut 01

This is the view of the main supply pipes from our apartment, and at a close up ...

Water Cut 02

And this is how we replenish our water supply for the past 2 days.

I am very disappointed with how the management handles the whole water shortage/outage issue. It is becoming such a drama. At first, it was the abrupt water shortage and dirty water supply, heavily dosed with chlorine during my first year at B-Block. Now, in this L-Block, it's the low water pressure throughout the block every bleeding day since we moved in - and now this. I know that we are merely students who pay minimal maintenance fees and rent, but we still deserve decent facilities and amenities, and nothing less than that.

Why can't there be more responsible hands handling this matter? Are we that insignificant?

In light on all these frustrations, I received a CNY gift yesterday on gratituity of a junior. It made me happy, because I helped my juniors in things that they do not understand - and I help them, guide them at any time, without any hopes to have my favour returned.

CNY Gift

And the junior who gave me this, had a very eerie resemblance of KA1, the F6 Chemistry teacher. But of course, she is way pleasant.

What else is there to update?

OHH!

One of the things that I looked forward to before starting this semester are the lab sessions. I do not fancy going to lectures all day long, with people who bores me, dead-out, the whole day.

First, we get to go to campus with just any t-shirts, whether the ones to sleep with, or maybe those round-collared ones, and the lab coat.

2BPB 08/09

I have to admit though, that the colour of our faculty's lab coat has to be the saddest one of all. We all seem to resemble those factory workers who assembles electronic parts into a TV-set. Engineering students have the coolest colours, ranging from blacks and blues. The Faculty of Technical Education has the royal purple. But I think this shade of blue that we got is not actually that bad. What gave me a nightmare was the students from the Faculty of Information Technology with the dull and sullen grey.

I took Manufacturing Technology which gave me a chance to be exposed to laborious work like this ...

Disc Cutter in action

... and more equipments in upcoming days!

There is also Total Quality Management which gave me the permission to explore the state-of-the-art equipements in the Quality Labs. The first equipment that m group got assigned to was the Coordinate Measuring Machine (CMM).

Coordnate Measuring Machine CMM

And those important things in the CMM are ...

Touch Trigger Probe

the Touch Trigger Probe (TTP)

... which has high sensitivity towards touch on any surface
whatsoever.

Qualification/Master Sphere

the Qualification/Master Sphere

... which is used initially in any measuring process to calibrate
the equipment as a whole functioning unit,
so that it recognises what is it doing.

Datum

the Datum

... which is our working block whereby we manoeuvre the TTP to measure
the dimension of any cylindrical, conical or cubical shape,
with just 3 touches or more!

And this is just the first TQM lab session. It was a great experience indeed. I was holding to an equipment which could easily cost a quarter of a million. Of course, you get to see me in action as well ...

In Action with CMM

And suddenly it seems so awesome to be pursuing Technlogy Management. Lol.

| book | Coma - Robin Cook
| mood | bored

Filed under Daily Dose | feeling sick?

February 24, 2009

[386] 25 random things about me |part 1|

by chenyeng2706 | 02:48 AM

Here's to AvineshKumar. I think he sorta tagged me. But I am a n00b in FB. And I cannot access FB from here now. They are apparently trying to go through a Wi-Fi testing phase in the whole campus without students accessing social networking sites and streaming websites. Kebencian yang tak terhingga.

So anyways, I am putting up this here. Hope that you don't mind. =)

I look so tough at the exterior, people think I have no fears. But, as a matter of fact, I am katsaridaphobic. Especially the ones that fly, I can scream and wail and run in no orientation, all simultaneously. Yea, I see you laughing.
I am very dependent on caffeine. But deep down, I know caffeine no longer gives me the effect [read: exhilaration & perked-up excitement] I used to get when I first started drinking. In these recent years, I still consume it religiously every morning to "persuade" myself that it is time to be awake. However so, I really forward to drinking my morning coffee. The contentment is just indescribable.
I am at my best with loud music plugged into my ears when solving calculations, statistical problems, anything mathematical, or when I need to think. I just realised it when I started varsity life. Heck, I aced every mathematical / calculation-related subjects that I took since I started my first semester. *why didn't I find out about this in F6?!*
I am very self-conscious. Not in the way I dress. Just in the way I talk and the way I carry myself when I face other people.
Everything that I buy for myself either to be worn or used, must have an average lifespan of 3 years. Ok, maybe I didn't INSIST on 3 years, but what I meant is that I don't buy something for myself unless I know that I would use it in the long run.
Sometimes, I wake up, I look at myself in the mirror, I will realise that I actually look good (the wake-up look) and I will remain happy for the rest of the day. Do you do the same?
I always wanted to be different. Most of the time, I am the trend-setter for some things, but I will never follow others on anything. Not in terms of fashion or dressing sense.
I like listening to random music in shuttle buses or vans. Not those Malay songs that spells CINTA at a monotonous tone. It's those Indonesian bands that I like. They have great tunes that gets stuck in your head even though you have just heard it once. Try "Dewi" by Dewa, or "Ruang Rindu" by Letto.
I like walking fast, and be the first in a group of walking people. I don't like someone hovering in front of me when I am racing to class in walking mode. I seriously feel like tripping those idiots who walks in the most lemah-lembut manner.
I like flavourful food. Not exactly food that burst in multitude of flavours. What I meant is just that I want is like, if this plate of fried rice is meant to be salty and spicy, please don't lack in either tastes. To hell with being health-conscious with the tagline Less Sugar, Less Salt and Less Oil. In a dish, every flavour must be equivalently strong to bring out the accompanying tastes. Salt complements sweetness, sugar complements salt. People who cook would know what I mean.
Because of #4, I don't quite like meeting new people. It makes me feel vulnerable, susceptible to feeling stupid, gullible, or ignorant. But then, in contrary to the feelings I have before meeting new people, after I have gone through the "meeting" part, I can just be anyone's friends.
I am a professional in blowing-water. This is an ability which I do not know how to word out in decent English besides the humble crapping / bullshitting / talking without thinking. That is why I think I am particularly good in literature reviews in my reports after going through journals. And I consider this as a good talent, and and, I have never told anyone about this.
Besides technological gadgets and my supplements, I am most willing to spend on shoes and things related to my hands and feet.
Partly because of #4 also, I am very observant of my surroundings and the people I meet. And before I continue, I would like to stress that this is a very, very, very bad habit that no one should learn or follow. What I do is that I can interpret one's attitude and personality with just a simple conversation. So with this so-called ability, I judge people too much at times. I don't know how I do it, or I cannot explain how I make such interpretations. I just know.

#15 - #25, I guess you just have to wait for Part 2.

| music | Cookie Jar - Gym Class Heroes feat. The Dream
| mood | sleepy

Filed under Daily Dose | 6 person vomitted

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