Living between Realism and Idealism

Entries for August, 2009

August 30, 2009

[408] Moonlighting the brain trickles down inspiration, finally!

Sorry for the hiatus. It has indeed been a long and quiet month here. And this quietness has somehow reflected my thoughts. I have had difficulties in wording myself these days and mind you, the feeling is very bad inside. To have something in mind, but not being able to string it up properly in sentences is even worse than not being able to speak. To speak is a mindless act, to write is an art of its own.

This semester's pace is picking up rather quickly and I am trying very hard not to faint in the attempt of keeping up with it. Nothing is different, not the workload, neither it is the people. Perhaps it is just me, trying too hard this time. But I am not trying too hard to impress, neither am I trying too hard to survive. So what exactly is different?

I think I am getting confused of myself.

In the beginning of the semester, there was a talk held for us third-years regarding ways to strengthen our soft skills. It would have been a much enjoyable talk if it was held on a weekday instead of a Sunday.

So, all of had to drag our sleepyheads to the campus and sit through the 8-hour talk. We spent our time texting people, chattering away, some even dozed off with their heads bopping to and fro. After the eight excruciating hours, we were dismissed. When I got home, I wanted to practise the hiragana writing, and so I tried to dig out my mechanical pencil and also an eraser. What I discovered was that my mechanical pencil was nowhere to be found.

My Pilot Shaker-X [picture] was once again lost.

I lost my first one during my first year first semester, and it was in Room FPT5. I vaguely remembered that I left it on the chair. And I would have probably rushed out of class after we were dismissed because I had to make it in time to the bus stand for the last shuttle bus back to college. The next day, when I went back to look for it, my shaker was gone. Someone must have conveniently taken it back home. I was left devastated for a week plus till I went back to Ipoh and the brother bought me a new one, yay!

And imagine the (even greater) devastation I felt when I lost it the second time. I was unhappy, down, moody, disappointed, frustrated, ill-tempered, yadda, yadda. Everyone knew that something was wrong with me because my emotions were apparent enough on my face.

Friends offered to help me look for the precious shaker of mine the day after. But I was not very hopeful in getting it back because losing something in UTHM is equivalent to sending something off to a point of no return. Le sigh.

The next day, from mid-day to evening, I received texts from friends saying that my shaker was not found. My little ray of sunlight was immediately snatched away from me, and I was left in the dark for the rest of the day. A friend told me that he would come over to find me in my house later at night because he said he wanted to console me. He also said that I would be much happier after seeing him, he guaranteed me of it.

At first, I declined because I was in no mood in entertaining people at that time. But his insistence won over my reluctance. So, heck.

When he came, he stood at the front door, looking at me with his right hand in his pocket. And then he asked, "Are you still unhappy? Don't worry, I am sure that you will be happy to see me." I replied, "Why is that so? Do you have any magical powers to make me happy?"

He then said, "Nope. But I am nice enough (he took his hand out of the pocket and hands me a Shaker-X) to buy you a new one."

With a very surprised face and a gaping mouth to boot, "You bought me a new one?? That's impossible, I did not even tell you what it looks like in detail!"

After flipping and turning the shaker over and over again, "This is not a new shaker, this is my shaker!"

I was very sure because I dropped my shaker once, tip-first onto the floor, and it's slightly dented at the tip. Then I asked in an elevated voice, "Where did you find it??"

"I was lucky lar. It just appeared right in front of me."

"Serious lar, please?"

"Okay okay. I searched the hall first. But then there was no mechanical pencils lying around except for pens and papers. I walked around the whole hall, but I found nothing. So I was about to give up, till I saw some cleaning ladies outside the hall. I approached them and asked if they have seen any mechanical pencils while sweeping the floor in the hall. One of the ladies said that she saw something which might look like a pencil but she said it resembles more of a pen."

"Then? What happened to it?"

"She said she swept it along with other trash and thrown it into a rubbish bin."

"OMG. And?"

"Then I asked her which rubbish bin and I ransacked that bin lar. And that's where I found the pencil. I didn't know what it looked like, but that mechanical pencil I saw (points at my shaker) looked precious enough. So I just picked it up."

"You went through a rubbish bin for my shaker?"

"Yeahh. Otherwise, how would I be able to come up with one shaker which can replicate your shaker?"

*dumbstruck*

You tell me how I felt after hearing that from him.

He added, "Oh yea, I have not washed it since I took it out from the rubbish bin. I think you better wash it before using it lar."

Okay, perhaps it is not something impressive for some of you, but to me, not many people are willing enough to get their hands dirty for me. So, to friend, I just wanted to say that I am really grateful for having you to go to great lengths for me. I am not a very expressive person (actually), but do know that I appreciate it very much, and I promise not to be so careless and lose it again because I know that I will not be as lucky next time.

These days, I have been looking forward to my mornings. Not exactly in the waking-up part, but in meeting people. Perhaps this is why I have not been skipping morning lectures as frequent as the last few semesters. I feel that I have things to look forward to every day. I wonder what could be it?

I have been an avid gossip-monger, and it has even worsened lately. Every thing and every one interests me. But nobody can blame me for having the curiousity of a cat and also astounding observation skills, okay?

Onto better news, I am gradually losing weight. And I do not practise dieting because I always believe that the sole motivation of my still-functioning brain is by fulfilling my gastronomic desires (not just needs). I have had plentiful badminton feats and new in this semester, multiple rounds in basketball and volleyball. I hope to lose more by the next CNY.

Do look forward to my next entry. Comments, please? I miss my readers!

| music | Come On Get Higher - Matt Nathanson
| mood | blah

Filed under Daily Dose | 8 person vomitted

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